This morning, God spoke to me about the Widow at the Synagogue giving up her last two coins. Sometimes, it takes a friend to help me realize that some of the things that I am looking for is unnecessary. In my Birthday Wishes blog post, I expressed my reading inadequacies compared to Joelle's, with the possibility that I was misleading myself into believing that I would establish a greater understanding, of God in particular. My friend pointed out to me that God reaches us in ways that are unique to us. Yes, I don't have the patience to read the Bible. What I did discover is that I have the patience to have the Bible read to me. Not only the patience, but I find that I can absorb it in far greater measures than I can with reading. My eyes and mind wander off with reading. I stay focused when listening. This point was proven this weekend when our nephew was over at our place and Joelle read the first 5 chapters of John to him. I was able to sit and absorb those entire five chapters. I didn't move from my seat. I didn't wander mentally. I was there, as I closed my eyes and shut off all visual distractions and just listened. It was great.
I often feel inadequate when I go to church... or at least I feel that I am made to feel inadequate because I never take my printed Bible with me, and I'm always feeling questioned by the pastor when he says things aloud like, "for those that didn't bring their Bible" or "what is your Bible sitting on the shelf for" or something else along that vein. I don't bring my Bible because I feel that I do much better hearing it from pastor. Just like I do much better listening to when Joelle reads it to me. This reminded me of the Widow because I'm made to feel like I'm inadequate because what I do come with is something that is almost taken for granted by them.
I come with my ears and my listening mind. Those are my two coins. However, they are the most valuable coins that I have ever owned and given. I give my ears and attention to the pastor. I soak in the vibrations and let it touch my soul and make it resonate, just as music makes it resonate. I pick things up that way. That's far greater to me than any printed word.
It doesn't mean that I don't need the Bible. Quite the contrary. What I probably don't need is to pain myself unnaturally by trying to look at words on the page to get the message. I can use my strengths and listen to the Word being read to me and learn that way. After all, long before there was the Gutenberg press, people spoke the Bible to each other. I can definitely study and experience God in this way and not feel as if I am missing something. I don't need anything more than what I already have to get the experiences that I desire. I have the Bible in my iTunes library and on my iPod. That's all I really need.
And don't get me wrong... I do read. But, I still don't have the patience for it. And when my favourite magazines start shipping out their articles in audio format, I will immediately change my subscriptions to them. Fortunately, Sound on Sound does have audio examples on their web site to help me digest the printed word a little better, and for that I am wholly grateful.
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